If I asked you to write a list of the things you worry about, what would you write? You may worry about your children, your parents, or perhaps you have worries about your job or health. Most likely you could rattle off your worries without batting an eye. You could explain the why part so easily that you might even convince me you have reason to worry. Yet I wouldn’t join you in the worry game because I know that worrying only causes more worrying.
Do you know how I know that worry lives in tomorrow? Simple. Look at the list you wrote down about your worries. Are any of those things occurring right this minute? Or are they events from your past that you worry will occur again? If not, then they are simply projections of events you fear will happen. Now to be fair, they might actually occur. Or they might not. But the point is that while you spend much of your time worrying about them, none of them are actually occurring.
“Control is an illusion.”
That’s true, as much as I would like to believe I can control events and people in my life, I can’t. I may be able to alter certain events or relationships due to how I behave, but I cannot control the outcome. So if we can accept that as truth, as much as we would like to deny it, what’s the point of worrying?
As human beings, we tend to worry about the future. When we use up our mindfulness on a future that we can’t control, we no longer are present in the moment we have now. Perhaps the only moment that matters. After all, what we do in this moment may not be able to control the outcome, but it can have the ability to alter our future.
To be consumed in a future that is not here, thoughts of events that have not occurred, is to completely miss today. “Worry is like a rocking chair, it will give you something to do, but won’t get you anywhere.” Think about it…it is the truth! Worrying will fill your head with plenty to think about, but your mind will be so cluttered with what is next, that you won’t have the strength, energy, nor desire to be with what is here and now.
You’re neglecting yourself and the people around you as you continue to live each day in a space that doesn’t exist. Tomorrow.
How can you be present in this life, when you’re consumed with a day that doesn’t exist?
The answer is quite simple. Every time your mind begins to wander, fantasizing about what might come, what might be next, close your eyes and take a deep breath. Do a quick scan of your body and visualize what is actually occurring in this moment. Remember that the sound you hear, the peacefulness that actually stirs in you when you are still and silent, is really what is going on and is surely nothing to worry about.
Want the controls back in your life? Relax and enjoy this moment. Today is all we really have and will never be quite the same again. As for tomorrow, we can think about that…once it gets here.