A Year to Remember. 2020
How do we clean this muddy slate, so we can start anew?
As we close the books on 2020, I wanted to reach out to all of you and say, I'm grateful you made it. Not hypothetically speaking, but honestly, from the bottom of my heart, if you are reading my words this second, I am grateful you have survived 2020. I am grateful that I have survived as well. Let’s just start there for a minute. Because not everyone has been as fortunate.
Writing a year in review, getting excited about the possibility of a clean slate for the New Year, has always been a tradition for me. I usually am motivated by something I have seen at the gym, the coffee shop or something I overheard standing in a line at the store. Yet this year was different and harder to find a topic to reflect on.
Then came the Holiday cards, an appreciated sense of normalcy, as well as an aha moment. Most of them were simply family pictures like every other joyful holiday. But there were a few that captured the feelings of many.
The caption above the family photo read: GOOD RIDDANCE.
At first I laughed, then I thought, catchy…but afterwards, I felt sad about the common theme of wanting to nearly erase this past year. I mean, we can’t anyway, regardless of what we want. And that is not just true now of course, but every year. Yet my perspective, having experiencing some really tough years way before COVID reared its scary face has since changed.
My reflection focus in the past several years has been guided by things to get excited about next! The possibility of new relationships, business ideas, growth, vacations…the focus has been on getting excited about what we can’t yet see or sometimes even imagine. It’s the possibility of the unknown.
Yet how do we reflect effectively when we are only able to see the parts we most disliked? And why not just forget the whole year and move on anyway? Wouldn’t that be easier? I guess it depends on your intention.
Reflection gives us the time to contemplate what we want to leave behind, and what we want to take with us. This then fosters growth and creates space for what is still to come…with an open mind. In order to experience a clean slate with an openness for what’s next, we should experience the entire reflection, not just the parts that stand out most.
Think of reflection as the palette cleanser in between long drawn out meals. A little sweet sorbet to clean the palette so we can experience the next course. Skip it if you like, but no doubt that 2021 may feel remotely like you are feeling right now.
Perspective is everything.
Let’s start this reflection by looking deeply at the gray matter hiding just under the surface of Covid days. Days hidden behind masks, zoom calls that replaced actual gatherings and daily fears around, do I need to get tested? But what if then we continue to shift our focus to what was, rather than what wasn’t?
Underneath that dark matter of a contagious deadly virus, there was something sweet wafting faintly in the air. Did you notice it? Not nearly enough to cover-up everything else, but just enough that with one deep inhale, you could feel it.
Life, that is.
It was the year that brought my family back to the old days. The days where we lingered around the dinner table talking because there was no where else to go. The afternoons by the fire working on a puzzle together as our hearts beat in sync. Friday night movie time with teens that were normally at the soccer fields, hockey rink or just driving around town. Family hikes, beach getaways, walks, runs, basement workouts and a lot of cooking and eating. So so so much eating. Way less cleaning.
It was the year that I rarely felt rushed, worried about what to wear and didn’t need lipstick. The year I became an efficient 30-minute shopper, mastered a DIY bathroom make-over, could tile a floor, and even tap dance. The year that I went through psychological thriller books like they were hot cookies just from the oven. The year that being a home-body was in-style, redecorating was a daily task and working with my toy poodle snug in my lap made everything better.
It was the year we could not run from conflicts, but instead talked them through. The year that togetherness with our bubble was the best option. And the year my first born set his wedding date, reminding us that life will go on.
It was the year that listening was more important than speaking at times. And banding together had a whole new meaning.
It was the year that had moments I wished could last forever, days I begged for it to end. and times I wondered if the year had even started yet. It was the year that time stood still, while at the same time moved at a lightening pace. Each month wondering what happened to the month before.
It was the year that I felt motivated to memorize the color of my children’s’ eyes, their voices, the way they laughed and gently danced through through their life. It was the year I felt passionate about being alive.
Definitely a year to remember, even with all the hardships I would rather forget.